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  • Writer's pictureKelly Burns

What Are You For In Your Life?

Photo by Kelly Burns 2018

I scrolled down to witness posts in my Facebook newsfeed speaking of what is wrong with the world.

Isn’t it exhausting?

Don’t get me wrong, I can be the world’s greatest complainer. Here are a few of my recent ones: “I am certain these folks don’t like me. I can never win with certain people in my life. Why is everyone suddenly throwing their trash everywhere, and why do I have to pick it up?” Oh and yes, I want to be right about all of it and make others wrong for doing it.

Now that I have identified what I despise right now and when I find myself drifting to that ‘life-sucking’ place, I invite myself to try on the simple question;

“What am I for about life?”

Asking myself this question provided some very useful answers, even though my brain wasn’t used to asking this question.

I am for a clean community and environment.

I am for people. I love to connect. I am for people being connected.

I am for animals.

I am for people experiencing themselves as unstoppable when they hit roadblocks in their lives.

I am for senior citizens living well.

I am for art, music, writing, and all creativity.

On a walk the other day I picked up three tree branches that were broken and just happened to be shaped in the perfect form of a “Y.”

When my brother recently came to visit, he asked me why I have them hanging on my wall, as a decoration, and what they meant. I said “I put them there to remind myself that I am a “Yes” to life.” He smiled.

We all know people who we remember not by what they are committed to in their lives, but what they are a “No” to or what they are against. I am a “No” to certain elevators, sometimes BART, and Public Speaking. I am a “No” to being seated in the middle of a crowded and noisy restaurant. Lot of resistance there for me.

What is it for you?

Maybe it’s our healthcare system. Politics. The way our schools are being run. Your wife, husband, or girlfriend. Walking the dog, laundry, or dishes.

No is exhausting and takes a toll on our productivity, our families and our lives. What is in the way of being free and being a “Yes” to everything in our lives?

Could it have something to do with the many things we put energy into being against?

What is the commitment behind the No?

What would be possible for us if we only allowed what we are for to show up in our lives, versus feeding the negative energy (on a daily basis) of what we are against?

We all have limited time on this planet. I know that’s trite, but it’s true.

Imagine what life would be like, if we could introduce ourselves like this;

“Hello, I am Kelly, and I am for communication, family, creativity and the well-being of animals. Who are you and what are you for?

I invite you to write two lists of what you are for and what you are against. After you write the list of what you are against, destroy it. Ask three friends to check you, every time you start going down the rabbit hole of complaints.

Work from what you are for every day, and put those commitments on your wall in front of you in your office or workspace. This will remind you of the true passion you have in your life, and your vision for a better world.

Maybe the world doesn’t look the way you envision it should look at this moment. Don’t give up. Share with others your vision, and go to work to make it a reality.

I believe that what you are for says more about who you are and why you are here, than what you are against.

It’s the legacy you will leave for the world.

Your “truth,” your “why,” that gets you out of bed in the morning.

What are you for in your life?
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1 Comment

Neil Panosian
Neil Panosian
Sep 16, 2021

This is great proof as to the power of changing the question we ask ourselves! Great post!

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